Musings of a Sleep-Deprived Mom

My thoughts are a bit of a mess this morning. Well actually I’m a bit of a mess this morning. See going on nearly 2 years with only one or two nights that include uninterrupted sleep for greater than 7 hours (most nights I get 4 hours and then up once more before we have to start the day) can do that to a person. So why do you care? Well, honestly I don’t know if you do. But a few nights ago I had some thoughts on this.

See it was midnight. I’d been to sleep for one glorious hour before my adorable alarm clock decided to go off. I fed him and walked him and tried to put him back down but he had none of it. So I tried the cycle again. It failed again. So we walked, and walked, and walked. (If you’re LDS yes, I felt like one of the little pioneer children). He wouldn’t let me sit or lay down without bawling. The only way I could keep him content was to just keep walking.

I remember going through these same nights with Tiger. He was actually a much worse sleeper than Bear is (at least so far, I’m crossing my fingers, and knocking on wood!). I couldn’t sleep well through much of my pregnancy and then he would regularly wake up 1-5 times a night until he was about 4 ½ . I used to count myself lucky if I could get in one good night every two months with him.

It’s kind of funny, sometimes I think God gives me these nights to draw a little nearer to Him. Because often that’s all that’s left when I get into that endless, mindless, forever pacing, at least after I’m done crying because I don’t think my arms can hold them a second longer. I usually end up going back to God, pleading with Him for help and understanding. Why can’t this child that I love so much just relax and get the rest that they need? Why do they demand so much that I feel unable to give? What am I doing wrong? How am I supposed to get anything done or be any good to anyone when physically, emotionally, and mentally I am completely spent?

I still don’t really have all the answers. I have however come to realize that I can look at this two ways – I can continue moaning, crying, and whining or I can try and look for the good. Here are just a few of the blessings that I’m trying to focus on –

I am thankful that I have been blessed with three beautiful children. I wouldn’t trade them for anything – even for a few nights of uninterrupted sleep.

I am thankful that even though it’s small and simple in its own way I know that the service and love I give to these children helps me become a little more like my Savior.

I am thankful that in these quiet hours of service I have been blessed at times (mostly those times when I allow myself to just relax and let go) to be able to feel the Spirit whispering answers to questions I have had and helping me sort through problems that I’ve been pondering over.

I am thankful to know that these moments were part of the Savior’s atonement. He knows my aching arms and tired feet. He knows my tears and pain. If I will allow myself to be comforted, He stands ready and waiting.

In short I can look at these challenges of life and parenting as boulders that block my path or mountains to lift me as I climb. People say that these years fly by too quickly and I know that’s true. These little ones will only be little for so long and then they won’t need me to be there to wipe their tears and help them relax into a peaceful slumber. I often hear the “oh you think it’s a burden now but you’ll miss it when it’s gone”. I’m still not sure about that one but at least I know that if I keep looking for the good then I’ll be able to smile and look back and remember these days with fondness, grateful that I was so blessed.

Calling Poison Control

So tonight we had to call the poison control hotline. Again. This is the third time I’ve had to do it. Once was because Tiger had taken some of the antibiotics meant for Monkey. Another was because one of the kids decided to eat half a tube of toothpaste. Tonight Bear found the kids gummy multi-vitamins and decided to feast on about half of the bottle – around 50-80 of the little guys. Little guy is getting more and more clever I tell you, he’s a good kid but I think I’m going to have a handful managing his curiosity.

Anyways, the people on the hotline are awesome. They really are. Each time they’ve calmly checked everything out and thankfully each time we’ve been told everything would be all right. Somehow they even manage to not laugh at my paranoia. At least not while I'm on the line. I bet they have some funny stories to tell though. Tonight was the closest call because Bear is so little but thankfully there’s no iron in the vitamins so the worst they said should be a really upset stomach with maybe some constipation or vomiting. All in all, he enjoyed his feast and hasn’t shown any signs of it having phased him at all yet!

So any parents out there – have you had to call poison control for something random like toothpaste or vitamins?

If you haven't had to call yet, be thankful but just remember the number is usually in the front pages of any phone book and don't be afraid just to check things out even if it seems crazy. Better safe than sorry. 

Kid Logic

Can I start by saying how much I love my kids. Seriously, I do, I can’t imagine where I would be without them. I think they’re amazingly creative, smart, and talented… after all I’m their mom, I think it’s in the contract somewhere with nature that we’re all just a tad biased when it comes to our kids. Still, have you ever tried to reason with a half-pint ankle-biter? Sometimes it makes me want to pull my hair out… other times it just cracks me up.

They think they have all the answers. Life would make perfect sense, it’s only us crazy parents getting in the way and messing it up… well, sometimes other adults too. If only they could just be in charge and run the world things would work the way they should, right? EC came up with a name for those moments - kid logic.

It used to drive Monkey nuts when he would she was in the middle of a kid logic rant and he would call her on it. Recently she got to turn the tide just a little as Tiger started in on one. Yesterday driving around doing errands Tiger informed me that he didn’t need to do reading as part of school.

When I asked him why he thought that he didn’t need to read any more he put on his very best in charge voice and started listing his reasons - he didn’t have to read when he was at real school (ummm…. I don’t think so), reading was just too boring, and he already knew how to read.

The funny part of this that had me cracking up was that he’s also stated recently that his life’s ambition is to be a famous author. I asked him how he thought he could do that if he stopped reading books now. He matter-of-factly told me that he already wrote books and he would be fine. I tried hard to keep myself at least somewhat serious sounding as I told him it was practically impossible to know everything at just 7 years old that he would need to know about story telling to be able to be an author. Monkey smiled and called him out on his kid logic.

To give him some credit, he amended his statements today and says that he does like reading science books and he plans on being some kind of scientist now instead. I told him to go for it. :-)

What are some of your favorite kid logic stories?